WE MUST ASK THIS: HAS ANYONE HAD MORE FUN IN LIFE THAN MARK CUBAN?
He remains in charge of basketball operations with the Dallas Mavericks, which seems absurd, considering he'll make $3.5 billion in selling his team to a casino tycoon's widow (worth $32.3 billion)
He might be tempted to interrupt tonight’s political monstrosity, a weird debate between Gavin Newsom and Ron DeSantis, but Mark Cuban will count his latest blessing instead. He doesn’t want to run for president in 2024, saying Wednesday he has “no plans” after confirming his family “would disown me.”
Not to mention dismantling him. There was no thought of how his life would be unveiled, including his defense against the Securities and Exchange Commission and his frequent nightclub takedowns with his players. No one of his ilk ever has opted for the top office, with too many crazy stories. In this glaring era of social media, Cuban doesn’t want any of those investigations.
So why not celebrate? Party down and consider the friggin’ improbability that he sold the Dallas Mavericks for $3.5 billion, after buying them for $285 million in 2000, and somehow remains in control of basketball operations. Only Cuban could find Miriam Adelson, the widow of a massive casino tycoon, and entrust her that he’ll keep running a team he’s dumping for another gargantuan NBA amount.
He will assume the future of Luka Doncic. He’ll help Adelson attempt a fresh casino and arena in Texas, where gambling hasn’t survived the state legislature. He will continue to be Mark Cuban, with a plentiful wad of moolah, thanks to the female wallet of the world’s 35th-richest person. Is the story real? This man, spending millions on league-assessed courtside fines, rallied an awful franchise to a 2011 championship. This man became such a fan-fervent owner that he would have been awesome in Chicago, where he spent a drunken day with a friend at Wrigley Field and texted me in the press box between innings. This man boasted as he wanted — telling me on ESPN’s “Around The Horn” that he agreed with “nothing” I had to say — and will spend 16 years on the popular show “Shark Tank” when he retires next year.
Now, the owner drops down in size but remains in charge of the Mavericks. At 78, Adelson forks out money and can take over as the franchise’s governor, where Cuban found trouble in 2018, when he paid $10 million to women’s organizations to address sexual harassment in his front office. Yet he’ll remain behind the team bench, almost every night, and continues to act like any other nutty devotee. Most owners are regarded as burned toast when they sell. A guy who walks around in Mavs gear can carry on as he wants.
He’s richer than ever. He’ll spin trades in management. He spends more time with his wife and kids, including a daughter in college. He lets clowns run for a grotesque office no one wants. From the suburbs of Pittsburgh, via the business school of Indiana University, Cuban might go down among the greatest Americans of his time. No one had more fun. No one splashed it for more glory on television and electronic media.
Said the statement from Adelson and her son-in-law, company president Patrick Dumont: “The Mavericks (are) one of the world's most successful and recognizable sports franchises. The team has won an NBA championship, has a long history of attracting international superstars and has been supported by a dedicated and passionate fanbase and leadership group led by Mark Cuban. The Adelson and Dumont families are honored to have the opportunity to be stewards of this great franchise. Through our commitment and additional investment in the team, we look forward to partnering with Mark Cuban to build on the team's success and legacy in Dallas and beyond.”
He was mentioned twice by the newest casino group to own a sports team. How many more to come? An NBA franchise in Las Vegas, we figure. No one doubts Cuban’s zeal to win, but he’s also a gambling forerunner, which turns him into America’s oldest bro-dude at 65. Maybe he can explain the bones to the rest of us. I don’t grasp how someone must win a game and still win a spread. The answer, I’m sure, involves lots of money.
There will be plenty of time to spread the word. You don’t have to like Mark Cuban for his bustling motormouth. You don’t have to like his abuse of officials. You don’t have to appreciate his fandom as a billionaire. You wonder how he turned Adelson, the most important donor to the Republican Party, onto his hardwood.
But he is a self-made monster with an eye to the future. I once said he’d have no chance of buying the Cubs, that a South Side bossman named Jerry Reinsdorf would interfere, just as he fell short of buying the Texas Rangers and Pittsburgh Pirates. It didn’t bother him, with an all-pervasive sense that something larger awaited him. Turned out to be Miriam Adelson, with her $32.3 billion in net worth, and if she doesn’t like Luka playing with Kyrie Irving, so be it.
###
Jay Mariotti, called “without question the most impacting Chicago sportswriter of the past quarter-century,’’ writes general sports columns for Substack while appearing on some of the 1,678,498 podcasts and shows in production today. He is an accomplished columnist, TV panelist and talk/podcast host. Living in Los Angeles, he gravitated by osmosis to film projects.